Mayer Rokitansky Küster Hauser syndrome, named after the four medical professionals that discovered it, is the complete absence or underdevelopment of the reproductive system. 1 in 5000 people born female (with XX chromosomes) are diagnosed with MRKH, usually after not starting their periods or having difficulty with penetrative sex as teenagers. A lot of people with MRKH are told "to have sex" they'll need to create a vagina, but this societally led message is due to penetrative sex being the only type of sex that is worthy. Sex is so much more than PIV and the choice of creating a vagina through dilation or surgery should come hand in hand with pleasure education and an understanding of vulva orgasms.
Check out the MRKH Podcast here to hear stories from around the globe.
Some people with MRKH who have absent or much shorter (than the average!) vaginas may choose to go through a process of vaginal dilation to stretch their vaginal canal to enable penetrative sex with a partner or sex toys. MRKHers have all the same glands that produce natural lubrication when aroused as other vulva/vagina owners (friendly reminder- not all vulva owners "get wet" naturally!), but lots of lube is recommended as putting pressure inside the vagina can be painful.
Those with MRKH have a typical external vulva and a clitoris, so given that an estimated 80% orgasms are clitoral, pleasure for those with MRKH is not dissimilar to those without MRKH. Lots of people with vaginas enjoy penetration, and as it's the societal norm it can make MRKHers feel more comfortable with their bodies after going through dilation. Penetration can also be very pleasurable, although the nerve endings sit outside there are areas internally that can reach. A lot of the time though, penetration can be more of a psychological turn on when joined with clitoral stimulation, so for those who want to dilation or surgery can be helpful to reduce anxiety during sex.
Dilation
The dilators used for those with MRKH are just the same as those used by people who may have vaginismus. You can start with something small and thin, working your way up. To use dilators, medical staff suggest holding the dilator in with quite a lot of pressure for 20-30 minutes 2 to 3 times a day, but it is totally up to the individual how much they use them. Dilators are fairly clinical looking things, for some MRKHers this can add to the stigma and shame of using them, and switching things up to sex toys and pleasure tools can feel like a less medical way to dilate the vagina. Similarly, some scrap the dilators and may just utilise penetration with a partner to naturally dilate, or start with lube and fingers- everyone is different, there is no right or wrong way.
We're all Ohva it for MRKHers
Ohva, founded by MRKH advocate Ellamae Fullalove, is here to provide comfort, space and pleasure for every single body whilst paying close attention to people like those with MRKH who may have had discomfort, shame or low self esteem during their sexual experiences.
We want to promote solo pleasure and learning about your body, and have hand selected and curated products to support you on your MRKH journey.
More pleasure tips for MRKHers coming soon!